“圣诞便便汉基先生”首次出现在同名剧集中，由凯尔·布罗夫洛夫斯基演唱。这首歌的扩展版则在“汉基先生的圣诞特辑”一集中出现。
背景[]
该歌在“圣诞便便汉基先生”中首先由凯尔·布罗夫洛夫斯基演唱，之后全体城镇居民也演唱了该歌。在“汉基先生的圣诞特辑”中，这首歌由圣诞邮差和几个孩子演唱。
歌词[]
“圣诞便便汉基先生”[]
Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo
he loves me and I love you
Therefore, vicariously he loves you even if you're a Jew
Sometimes he's nutty, sometimes he's corny,
he can be brown or greenish-brown
But if you eat fiber on Christmas Eve,
he might come to your town
Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo
He loves me. I love you
Heeeeeeee Looooooves Yoooooouu!
“汉基先生的圣诞特辑”[]
We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose
And we all know Frosty whose made out of snow
But all of those stories seem kind of... gay
Cuz we all know who brightens up our holiday
Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
Small and brown he comes from you
Sit on the toilet here he comes
Squeeze him between your festive buns
A present from down below
Spreading joy with a "howdy ho"
He's seen the love inside of you
Cuz' he's a piece of poo
Sometimes he's nutty
Sometimes he's corny
He can be brown or greenish-brown (Mmm Mmm)
But if you eat fiber on Christmas Eve he might come to your town.
Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
He loves me I love you
Therefore vicariously he loves you
布莱德利：
I can make a Mr Hankey too!
(fart noise)
卡特曼：
Well Kyle where is he?
凯尔：
He's comin'
斯坦：
C'mon dude push!
凯尔：
I'm trying!
卡特曼：
Oh wait wait I can see his head!
凯尔：
HERE HE COMES!!
(fart noise)
汉基先生：
HOWDY HO!
I'm Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
Seasons greetings to all of you
Let's sing songs and dance and play
Now before I melt away
Here's a game I like to play
Stick me in your mouth and try to say
Howdy ho ho yum yum yum
Christmas time has come!
Sometimes he's runny
Sometimes he's firm
Sometimes he's practically water
Sometime he hangs off the end of your ass
and won't fall in the toilet
Cuz he's just clinging to your sphincter
and he won't drop off and so you
shake your ass around and try to get it to drop in the toilet
and finally it does
Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
When Christmas leaves he must leave too
Flush him down but he's never gone
His smell and his spirit lingers on....
Howdy ho!
国语版歌词[]
“圣诞便便汉基先生”[]
黄金先生 圣诞便便
他爱我 我爱你
不再分你我 没歧视 即使你是佛教徒
虽然他很臭 虽然他粗野
还是那噁心的 大便绿
但只要吃 足够的 纤维质
他就自动来报到
黄金先生 圣诞便便
他爱我 我爱你
【】
“汉基先生的圣诞特辑”[]
你是否曾做过有故事的梦
梦境中你将嫁给张中牟
但睁开眼就发现事实残酷
你还没有资格来帮他暖被窝
黄金先生圣诞便便
不只是，一坨大便
小巧又坚挺，形状美
一般便便不能超越
他从马桶跳出来
一开口就是照过来
他能让你尽情发洩
因为他是条大便
虽然他有恶臭
虽然很粗野
却是有尊严的便便（没错）
不管你做什么颜色的梦都会变成咖啡色
黄金先生圣诞便便
他爱我，我爱你
好东西要和你分享
布莱德利：
我们迎着阳光一起便
黄金先生：
照过来
我是黄金先生圣诞便便
最ㄅㄧㄤˋ的祝福献给你
如厕通畅形状炫
便便是一种美德
不要遗弃便便
大家跟着我一起唸
照过来哟ㄘㄨㄚˋㄘㄨㄚˋㄘㄨㄚˋ
圣诞节快乐
有时像香肠
又像面团
有时像番薯签稀饭
有时像螃蟹紧紧掐住屁屁
不愿回到马桶去
他只想努力留在马桶上
你用力的左搓右揉上冲下洗
可是你最后还是搞不定
黄金先生圣诞便便
跟圣诞来，随圣诞去
挥手道别，不要伤心
民之所欲常在便便心
照过来
冷知识[]
- 在1998年这首歌在享有盛誉的英国圣诞歌曲排行榜上排名第2，仅次于当周发行的“巧克力咸酥球（歌曲）”。在接下来的一周里，这首歌赢得了榜首。在1999年圣诞节，“圣诞便便汉基先生”也名列前十。1999年接近尾声时，这首歌在90年代的最后一次排行榜上得了第4名。
| 第一季歌曲 | ||
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| 第三季歌曲 | ||
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